Are you in the FLOW?

• Book Reviews
• 11 Comments on Are you in the FLOW?
• Posted on 20 December, 20099 September, 2011
• by Katie Schwartz

When I read FLOW: The Cultural Story of Menstruation, I had assigned so many emotions to the book, I didn’t know if I was on spin or rinse. Rather, in FLOWguage I didn’t know if my tampon was in a twist or my womb was doing the jig.

As a feminist, I felt grateful that Elissa Stein had written FLOW, for women who have always embraced their periods and for women, feminists or not, who are uncomfortable calling it what it is, and who choose to cloak it in society’s accepted verbiage: The Ragâ. That time of the month Aunt Flo is in town, among others.

I felt validated and lucky that I grew up with parents who cried tears of joy when menses commenced; parents who encouraged us to say “If you have your period, you have your fucking period.

Having embraced menses to the point of engaging in menseversation with grocery store clerks, strangers, friends and family, and having written a few essays on the subject, I was so proud; I wanted to bleed stains of joy.

One part confessional and one part factual history; for me, FLOW wasn’t just a great read. Saying that marginalizes the enormity and significance of FLOW for women and for men. Obligatory reading for teens (can I get a FLOWhoo from high schools who teach sex education, please?!), and women who have and continue to menstruate, as well as men who fear the bleeding tunnel and, or want to better understand it.

I savored every menselicious second, absorbing Elissa’s personal, often hysterical and heartfelt account of her menstrual history. Paired with facts about the origins of menstruation; without giving away that time of the month, women took herculean measures to contend with their mighty streams. Facts about what menstruation really is and the myriad of misconceptions we have assigned and assumed, and so much more.

I would beg, no plead, no strongly urge you to buy FLOW and permit yourself the opportunity to trek through unchartered, forbidden tidal waves of menstrual loveliness.  If you don’t believe me, check out these reviews: Rebecca Elia: Bring on the FLOW, YouTube Flow view, Elissa Stein: History of Tampon, Tampax and a Belt with Hooks, Changing People, Inspirational Women: An Interview with Elissa Stein, The Undomestic Goddess: Elissa Stein and more. In addition to the great interviewers mentioned, FLOW has been reviewed, and Elissa has been interviewed by many other great writers and magazines.

Elissa gave me the opportunity to interview her and her blook, FLOW:

1. Why do you think FLOW is considered a controversial book with respect to feminism and menstruation?

Menstruation isn’t talked about, in an open, honest, thought-provoking way in mainstream society. It’s a punch line, a joke, or something to be avoided at all costs. By taking on all that it does—sex, religion, politics, advertising, big pharma, medicalization FLOW makes people nervous.

2.What made you write FLOW?

My period stopped for a year. I was too terrified and embarrassed to say anything to anyone. When I finally went for help, the doctor literally patted me on the knee, handed me a pack of birth control pills and told me my hormones just needed “jump starting. I was dismayed by both how I was dismissed, and how difficult it was to overcome my shame. About something that’s a biological reality. It was then, over 15 years ago, that the first glimmers of FLOW appeared.

3. FLOW has the power to change public perception about menstruation, both for men and women, was that one of your intentions when you wrote the book?

FLOW goes beyond perception. It has the power to educate women, and men. To chip away at the walls of shame and secrecy built centuries ago about menstruation.

4. When you were growing up, how did you feel about your menses? How was menses perceived and treated?

I still remember sobbing to my mother, standing in front of her 1971 green Plymouth Valiant, after sitting through that film in fifth grade. I was horrified and it didn’t get better. We never talked about it in my family. I tried as hard as possible to keep it a complete and total secret.

5. What are your feelings about “The business of menstruation”?

I took it all for granted until FLOW. And then my eyes were ripped open: the packaging, the pristine white-ness, the endless landfill, the plastic applicators, the negative advertising that kept age-old messages fresh. There are greener options out there that I never knew about, but, sadly, am too set in my old ways to switch to.

6. What is your favorite part of FLOW, if there is one and why?

I LOVE the art. As a visual society, we communicate through images. Including the ads, books, and products that have so often shaped how we think and feel, was a huge part of the story a big shout out to St. Martin’s, who understood what this book needed to be. My absolute favorite piece is “Are You There God, It’s Me Margaret? I called booksellers all over the country looking for the edition that was out when I was ten. When the package arrived and I pulled the purple-covered book out, I was transported to my friend Rachel’s basement, seeing it for the first time.

7. What do you define as the worst nicknames for a woman having her period and why?

Anything that’s derogatory. Like on the rag. What a horrible thing to say. Rags connote dirt, garbage, needing to sop up messes. And by phrasing it that way, menstrual blood is nothing but negative.

8. Why do you think women have so much shame about menstruating?

At this point in history, I believe it’s ingrained. Menstruation’s been getting a bad rap since the start of recorded history”and I’m sure long before. Check out the Bible. Menstruation was considered impure, unclean. Women had to be ritually cleansed before they could be touched again. By their husbands. After getting that message from the most holiest of sources for centuries, how could one possibly put a good spin on menstruation?

9. What do you love most about menstruating?

I’ve become so aware of my body at this point that I can feel the hormone shift, before the bleeding starts. I go from cranky, tired, wound up, to mellow. Happy. And I know, from that emotional change, that my period’s starting soon.

10. Let’s dish about you a bit… Tell me about Elissa Stein. FLOW is not your first book. Can you tell me about other work that you’ve written and more about you?

Elissa Stein. Hmm. I’m a mother first. The most important, life-changing, exhausting, exhilarating thing I’ve ever done. I’ve been married for 21 years to a person I’m still delighted to see every day. I’m a graphic designer, which led me to publishing, and then writing. I practice yoga, which keeps me steady. I’m recovering from an ebay addiction—I love vintage coats and outrageous 1960s summer dresses. My NYC closets are now packed to capacity.

FLOW is my tenth book. My first, CHUNKS, was a compilation of vomit stories. I’m not kidding. I’ve done visual histories of iconic pop culture: beauty queens, stewardesses, cheerleaders. My husband and I wrote a labor support guide for dads, inspired by his own ineptitude in the delivery room. I’ve got a host of projects I’d love to do next.

11. Are you a feminist? If so, what does feminism mean to you personally?

I had to answer this question recently and it took a couple of days to figure out what to say. Yes, absolutely, I’m a feminist, when that means working to continually challenge society to accept, respect, and acknowledge that women are equal, but different, from men.

12. What is your favorite curse word and why?

I try SO HARD not to curse and have managed to stop for years having kids was the motivation. But I’d have to say fuck. It says a lot in one word.

13. What are your favorite foods?

Watermelon. Fresh green peas. And super sweet pineapple. Not all together.

14. What makes you belly laugh?

Trying to win a staring contest with my son Jack. We both are terrible at it and absolutely crack each other up. EVERY time.

15. What makes you happy?

Finding grace in a yoga class. Especially to a good soundtrack.

16. What makes you angry?

Having to repeat myself. Over and over.

17. Where can I read more about you and buy FLOW? Who do I contact for an interview/review?

FLOW is in bookstores all over, and at amazon.com. There’s more about FLOW at www.flowthebook.com. My publicist’s info is listed. And for more about me please check out: www.elissastein.com.

THANK YOU, ELISSA, for writing FLOW, for being you and for your valuable time.

Now, off you go to buy FLOW. Follow Elissa on Twitter and Facebook. Visit her website.