What’s comfortable about a flangezam? First, preparing for a flangezam takes work and can only be described as a Silkwood shower with enough moisturizer to hide redness. Everything is shaved and plucked. My snatch can now be packaged and sold as potpourri to the finest department stores. Once in the exam room, I undress from […]
I wrote a bad headlines post on Mock Paper Scissors. Johnny B left a comment about “Ty-Me“, a couple o’ clowns. Sadly, I don’t think they went to clown college. Such a shame. I’m sure they would have made a huge splash in the hippest of clown circles. About Ty-Me Biography Started clowning in church, the kids got […]
A few years ago, I sorda swiped a brand new beige, yes, beige?!, Range Rover while driving my vintage 1983, beat to shit BMW, that I love, that is worth nothing financially and everything personally. When I exited the car to assess the damage, it was minimal at best. One panel was barely dented and […]
As the great Edna St. Vincent Millay said “I hate people, but I love humanity”. Today has been one of those days. You know the kind of day I mean; a clusterfuck wrapped in a riddle and dressed in confusion with a hint of resistance and a tablespoon of assholic behavior. People: Talk Want Need Narcissistic Ignore […]
Speaking for myself, I’ve never met a woman who recalled a childhood memory exuding joy about peeing. As a teenager, one late night, stoned out’ my fuckin’ noggin, I peed downhill and watched the stream, wondering how many ants were drowning. That was cool, or so I thought. Most of us weren’t aware of our […]
As a child, you were delighted when you learned to pee standing up all by yourself. WOW. Big accomplishment, to be sure. Of course, aim wasn’t as momentous as repainting the bathroom with Martha Stewart’s line of “Spring Your’Eyen. Growing up, discovering morning erections were, at first, scary, I’m sure. A former pee machine was […]
Let me preface this by saying, of course I know that not all men are like this, hello. I’m merely addressing what I have witnessed with a large enough percentage of men to write this lame ass post. The fist squeeze is the straight man’s hug or straight to gay man’s hug. Have you […]