I recently found out that a friend — He wasn’t just a friend, died. I don’t know how he died, I only know that he’s dead. I need to know how he died, but I never will. I wonder if he was buried or cremated. I wonder where he is and what he’s thinking. See, he died 17 years ago, but I found out that he died today via a Facebook friend request… in his name…
He was funny, clever, charismatic, burly, persistent and amazing.
What is he doing? He has to be doing something because I can’t wrap my brain around the fact that he’s just dead, lying six feet under or that his ashes are whirling around somewhere. Even though he shouldn’t be dead, he must be doing something, right?
I hope that he didn’t suffer. I hope that his death was painless. Fingers crossed.
Anyway, I got to thinking about having dead friends on Facebook. Surely, this can’t be a bad thing. I won’t get Farmville requests or pokes, or invites to Branch Out, or whatever the fuck that connection app is. He’s less likely to post spam pictures of shoes. So, there’s that.
I think the weirdest part (right, Katie, this is the weirdest part, whereas none of the aforementioned is. I know) was when I received an email from his email address via his friend. I was engaging in a conversation with dead him, his friend or a fraud? He can’t be dead, I need to believe that if he is, I was communicating with dead him, not his friend or a fraud. The tone was very unlike him, though.
17 years later, my dead friend reemerges.
I haven’t assigned an emotion to any of this yet.
Circle back with me in a week or so.
Circling back. Was he not dead? Maybe it’s an elaborate identity theft scheme.
I have no idea, Virgina. I haven’t emailed dead him again. I think he’s dead, though. I read an obit about his father’s death and in the obit, the writer cited that he was predeceased by my friend.
It’s all so deathy and sad.
Thanks for circling back.
I was trying to reconnect with an old friend a couple of years ago after not seeing him for five. Googled him (since my old computer crashed and I lost his info) only to discover his obituary. I didn’t believe it, couldn’t be. He’s my age. I’ve known him for 30 years. He’s beautiful and brilliant and talented and is the star of many wonderful moments imprinted on my heart. Then I saw the picture. It was him. He was dead. I missed his funeral. By two months.
I think the emotion is emptiness.