The Fist Squeeze Hug
Let me preface this by saying, of course I know that not all men are like this, hello. I’m merely addressing what I have witnessed with a large enough percentage of men to write this lame ass post.
The fist squeeze is the straight man’s hug or straight to gay man’s hug. Have you noticed their body language?
- The Teepee hug – Â Close enough to call each other chump w/o testosterone channeling into rage
- The roof of a house – Fear of a semi
- Siamese twins – If they call each other bro
Groin contact is frowned upon. Feared? There is some kind of issue somewhere with the potential of groin bumpage.
When I think of grabbing my friend’s hand, making a fist and then bumping shoulders or hugging with a safety crotch zone, it’s exhausting. This takes thought. This isn’t a hug. This requires focus and attention to detail.
It’s a fucking hug.
I’m ready to go back to bed just thinking about it.